Friday, October 14, 2011







我在暮霭中穿越逐渐稀释的阵雨,来到那座已有数十年斑驳历史的货栈。

日光西斜,一踏进门坎,

感觉眼前一暗,彷佛内里早已提前天黑。

雨水从我身上滴落,在地板留下一滩水迹。

我环视货栈里摆满各种杂货的复杂环境,清一清喉咙,开腔:“老板,我想买一把油伞。”

那中年老板睨视着我不发一语。半晌取出高凳,往货栈深处去了。

已经是第五间老货栈了。

它们都有着同样的霉湿味道,却没有我要找的事物。

栈里一片死寂。

只有门外淅淅沥沥的细雨声,有一搭没一搭地传来。

这大门活像一具毁坏的旧收音机,透门而入的尽是立体环绕的沙沙声响。

暂时摆脱雨阵,进入货栈以后,一阵倦意涌上心头。

发现自己连日奔波,已经多日未眠。

我颓然坐下,依偎在柜台旁,像等待什么稀世珍品般,静静等着。

中年人踱步而出,取出两把油伞。

“没有货了,就这么两把。”

“我要最好的那把。”我想也没想,便道。

中年老板瞟我一眼,低头对比两伞。

黑框眼镜下的眼珠微微上翻。

我将钞票按在柜台上。“我赶时间。”我道。“免找钱。”



出得门来,雨逐渐细小。

我将伞包好以后捧在胸前,径往雨中走去。

沿途经过一列古老商行,始觉父母亲当年南下来此定居,

转眼间大半世纪已过,这座小镇竟然似沉睡了的化石沙漏般,沉淀着,无多大发展。

我持续在雨中缓步而行。

途径大西亚茶室,不禁在店口停下脚步。

黄昏里茶香洋溢,

奶茶杯杯冲出来都是铿锵有声。

那汤匙撞击杯壁的冲茶声,一响就是数十年。

父亲最爱在这里喝茶。

那旧式茶室的茶香萦绕着他淡泊的人生。

作为一个不烟不酒不赌不嫖的父亲,

他唯一的消遣便是呷茶,呷一杯大西亚的茶。

有一回遇上雨天,他撑伞接我放学,

那时我身高只达他腰际,却已经懂得认字。

到了茶室便从他伞底溜出,对着门口牌匾,字正腔圆地念:大西亚茶室。

记忆里那个黄昏和如今竟然极其神似。

那年的暮霭笼罩我俩,头上细雨也似现在一样筛米般洒下,

年幼的我呆呆看着雨中一方横木牌匾,

看着看着,忽然感觉雨水已经停止落下。

抬头但见一把雨伞遮天,

是父亲伸长右手,

将伞撑到了我头顶上。

就因为不让我淋雨,他半边身子因此而暴露在雨中。

作为一个父亲的形象,他在黄昏细雨下饮露的剪影何其巨大。

身体略觉寒冷。

我一凝神,纷至沓来的回忆立即消散。

如今我环抱一支油伞伫立雨中,身体已然茁壮。

大西亚残旧的横木牌匾在日暮下显得比以往更萧瑟。

我踩着潮湿的脚步,进去买一包奶茶,

复跨上机车,再度朝雨阵冲去。

穿越朦胧的街景,一路驶回家里,

远远看见母亲已经打开门等待着我。

姐姐接过奶茶,

准备拿去装杯献给父亲。

我将层层累累的包裹打开,

取出滴水未沾的油伞,稳稳撑开,

轻轻放在父亲灵柩上。

铁棚外细雨迷蒙,灵柩前父亲的照片似罩上一层雾气。

我湿透着身子,


沉默。



这恐怕是我最后一次为父亲撑伞了。




PS.
感谢老师推荐的微型小说。


Thursday, October 13, 2011

Random shooooot !

 Miuki act cute ;)

 Thinking : Why the ants are running...


 The tree are blue! (Ignore Miuki)

 Smart shoot!

 Fish so happy when photo with me! :)

 Guess!

 Dinner. It's only Rm3.80 ! Worth !







I'm not feeling well. It's really suffering when making choices :(

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

le stress











I want to be a surrender.
I give up.


Stress are entering my life recently.

Financial, books, relationship, obstinate, and even grapevine...





Lucas always involved in worrying, fuck him.

He attempts to think lesser.




其實,我們活在一個很現實,很現實的世界,

我們不能不喜歡 厭倦 的侵襲。








Letup is far away from me.

Monday, October 10, 2011

故事。

Lucas 我不知道你几千年以后才会发现这篇文章==

whatthafack (怎样我就是特地在这里留下粗口)
我的非死不可不见了
很伤心心心心心
非常伤心心心心心

不过我觉得当你看到这个的时候一定很爱我的。
我的意思是说,比以前更爱我 哈哈哈 因为我很用心地去帮你照图片(在你的命令之下)
我真的很想把歌全部删掉
可是为了保护你纯洁美丽的心灵 我决定放你一马 阿哈哈哈 * 很好笑 *

我觉得你一定会很想念我
因为你再也不能一直偷看我的照片了
在我还未来得及通知你blog的使命 我就应经被无情的非死不可赶走了
阿 我现在很难过
我以后的日子会很难过 我很需要一个能够像你一样崇拜我的人
哈 哈哈哈哈哈 我是在开怀大笑吗 应该是吧 哈哈哈哈

ok 我给你这篇无价的遗言就告一段落


往后看!!!我就站在你后面!


有吓到对不对 喔哈哈哈。 祝君晚安。



Sunday, October 2, 2011

Look higher and longer



Yesterday went for visit my grandpa,

he had been sent to the old folks home to get better nurse to take care of him.

I first time went for old folks home, I'm not kidding.

Old folks home is scary for me, looks like very heavy feeling inside the house.

Quite, desperate, unhappy, curious are appear on their face.

Those old patient sleeping, and no ones visit them.

Well, maybe just I haven't saw yet.

The house is actually guarded by 3 malay girls, I don't know are they from local?

We immediately search for grandpa and try to talk to him.

Grandpa speaks unclear, we try to understand, but failed.

I look around the house,

there's only a TV to entertain them, no more.

Look, how boring if I'm here.

I'm not blaming, I just felt sympathy.

I suggest my father to bring some music or some Buddha songs for grandpa.

But I think I just get a very fast agree from my father, but he's not going to bring @_@

Looks at my grandpa, he's tired, his eye keep on staring the wall, he actually can see things.

He's regret about his life when he's still healthy I guess.

He drank lots of heavy drinks, beer and all that, and just play around,

this is what my grandma complain about him and don't allow him to back home.

That's cruel, the first thing I come to my mind for my grandma.

'' He just playing around and don't save his pension, look now, he deserve this. ''

I stunned.



---


One women who suffer from stroke,

heard she told my mother that her 4 brother din't ever come visit her at all,

but is good to heard her 4 sister did.

Fortunately my uncle they still come visit him, thanks God.

If not will be very pity.




I guess I gonna start think of future, look higher and longer,

beware and think twice before making decision,

that will not affect me when I'm old.

We don't know will your friend or family come to visit you when you're lying on the bed,

is better to take care by yourself.

Don't do things that just fun yourself in the moment,

looks higher and longer, looks future...

Please, I'm so sad to look them who don't care their life.

:(




It's exaggerate to say that communication is a panacea.

Talk a lot doesn't mean you're good enough in communicating,

sometimes it need to be silence.

If I'm silence, don't ask me why.


Tuesday, September 13, 2011

A hope for you and him.



Everything have several challenges before it come to success.

Well, my Mid Autumn Festival not really goes as what I want,

but it's enough for me, since I'm attempt to do so.

Perhaps the angel want us to be more brave, to be more hardworking for facing these challenges.

Right, my beloved and my dear?

Okay

...

Today,

I make 2 wishes in front of the moon.

I assume that the moon already receive what I wished, hehe.





I don't care, the moon must help me.

My grandpa need your help, he need some blessing from you,

help him.... Please...

other than begging, maybe I can try to do more charity for him.

_/\_

:')

______________________________________







Finally I ate the 1st moon cake!

Thank you, Sushi!

:D

And of course your 4 moon cake for breakfast :)




I love the feel of sleeping while siting.

very blur, forget everything,

and the brain very comfortable...

Just sleep, just fishing with using your head...




BUT,


when the saliva drop down.......

HAHAHAHA!





Monday, September 12, 2011

爸爸的爸爸






你不懂那种感觉。

时间不是一眨眼的快,是你回想起来,才会觉得快。

当初的他,很健康,只是走路一拐一拐的,

还很健康地到园里斩草。

在认为每一天都会像平常那样地过的时候,

晴天霹雳的坏消息震了世界一下,

是震了我的世界。

他病得很严重,在生死入口处徘徊,努力地呼吸。

没有人晓得他是怎样度过在那里每一天的夜晚,

想起都觉得可怕。

眼睛湿湿的,泪水好像滑下几千几万遍,

嘴巴只能动半边,左边瘫痪。


医院的设备糟糕到像是在垃圾堆里的废物,

我不了解这些病人是怎么挨过的,

就连病床看起来就好像随时都会打翻,从高处重重地摔下来

全部都左右不平衡。

里面乱七八糟,

这间医院是要变成仓库了是吧?

我真的无话可说。




曾经健壮,肚子组成一团力量的他,

现在却瘦骨如柴,很无助,很无力地躺着。

我很蠢,他说的每一句,我都觉得很模糊,

尝试回应却惨遭摇头,我的答案不是他想要的。

只用自己的嘴巴乱讲一通安慰的话,祈望自己给了他要的答案。

他好像很满足,很满意。

好像微笑了起来。

我眼眶含泪水地看着,我只能爱莫能助地好好看看他。

帮不到什么,只是能看着他,希望他不会觉得害怕,不会觉得孤独。






要是我们从小能好好照顾自己,那就好了,

不需喝什么酒,吸什么烟,做一些为了一时爽快的事情。

别把自己的身体当玩具玩,辛苦的时候,

你不知道有没有人会愿意了解你,探望你,甚至关心你。


就算是亲戚,也都不是什么东西,也可能不理你。

那时,你就会好好地想··




Wisely when choosing your life, your decision affect your future,

you don't know is that possible will someone care about you,

is better to take care yourself from now on.

That's my lesson today,

and lastly,

I pray for my grandpa,

He's a good person, a kind person, and he din't done anything wrong,

he just love us, love the nature,

God, he will be fine. Am I right?

















I wish you're there,

I wanna hug you when I was inside hospital,

I felt the sadness...

How's the life my grandpa now?

I think he's now sleeping or crying alone in the night, without moving,

is UNABLE TO MOVE.













Monday, September 5, 2011

Love!





'' You pull me out from the hole, and push me to the heaven. ''

I always tell you this.

You're the one who make me feel to continue stay in this world,

doesn't matter who are you and where you live,

as long as you love me I love you, that's enough.

Let's confront the challenge of time.

We want to be the winner, MUST.





Wisely pick the one who you loves and who loves you,

hold his or her hand,

for the rest of your life without regretful.





Thursday, August 18, 2011


烦恼很重,
有烦恼的人走路会变慢,

烦恼很轻,
不然不会轻飘飘的睡不着··

烦恼会让人成长,
烦恼是人类最伟大的发明,

而且据说有90%的烦恼,后来都没有发生

每个人都是烦恼界的爱迪生··




Tuesday, July 5, 2011





















- I fucking hate time. It run very fast, I can't even catch it -




I'm not very good in performing myself.

Sorry for that...

FML.

Sincerely apologize.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Ivana Pig Day.

Today's special.

Ivan's birthday, the cutest fat guy in our class :D

Hope you don't mind. =P

Thank you for the fun you gave in our course.

We really appreciate it.

Yesterday's steamboat really fun enough.

Last, Happy Birthday again ''IVANA'' !



The price are scary for yesterday,

about RM6XX!

But, still lose mine :P

RM 85x for my 18th birthday!

Thank you for CPR's celebration.

I think that's the best memory in life!

Hohoho!!

BLEK :P

UNIQLO

Waiting 3 hours for Rebecca's class again.

Went times square, Sungai wang and fahrenheit.

and also UNIQLO.

Testing. Like a aunty. @.@





















Bought a blue shirt.

Heard that the cloth over here were very comfortable to wear.

Quite cheap. Only Rm 24.90

:D





















Sleep until very sweet ya :D

Always sleep inside Ivan's car.





















Late enter class for 30mins.

I expected that Rebecca will keep complain us.

But she's not.

Ha, thanks God.

XP















Sunday, June 5, 2011

I'm most sucks person in the world.



















I'm a person who really love childhood.

I'm the one who always recall all the childhood.

I'm the one who always paying the more effort than others.

I'm the one who really care about them. And you.

I'm the one who really stupid, I want to give myself a damn.



Out of control was written every pages of my dictionary.

I actually hate myself a lot.

I hate all things that appeared in my life.

I don't know what should I love.

I only know,

I can invite angels sing around me.



I don't trust anymore.

The truth of the human being.

My friends always act very caring, very nice in real life.

When come to different world, they just wanna give you a damn.

That's stupid enough.

I'm not going to do anything. Just want to ketok his kepala.



Everything on the first time will makes everyone very excited,

first thing come on you, you'll just happy until bang the ceiling.

weary is the word to describe after the first time.

We all, as a human being, everyone should have this kind of attitude.

Don't you?

Ya, I think I'm like that too.


I don't know where my heart flew.

I cannot see clearly.



I got a really bad attitude.

I wants people to care about me.

I wants people take the initiative and care about me.

I scare to be the first one, and the stupid one.

I scare to lost something, but I'm not going to take any action when it's losing.




I don't know why I'll think like that, so please don't ask me why.




Just let the angels singing around me.

When I tired,

angels'll hug me,

Angel is the best friend for me now on.



Friday, June 3, 2011












一个苦者对和尚说:“我放不下一些事,放不下一些人。”

和尚说:“没有什么东西是放不下的。”

苦者说:“可我就偏偏放不下。”

和尚让他拿着一个茶杯,然后就往里面倒热水,

一直倒到水溢出来。

者被烫到马上松开了手。

和尚说:“这个世界上没有什么事是放不下的,痛了,你自然就会放下。”








Play with Cat


Yesterday when I was eating with friends in mamak.

We saw a kitty, can consider as cat also.

I don't even know how to play with cats.

But my friend know,

he teach us.

Damn cute lar this cat.

I love it so much.








Got 1 part I don't record.

It using its one front leg, holding the chair's leg,

and using one front leg catching the straw.

Very cute.

Like using kungfu.

XP


Thursday, June 2, 2011

Pasar Malam =3

This is so sweet

I love this !

How dare I bought this in Pasar Malam @@''
























臭豆腐

So many people ...

But.. the smells..

really sucks !

XP









Wednesday, June 1, 2011

3 and half hours AGAIN !

Duhh...

I hate my class.

Almost everyday have to wait for 3 and half hours,

and i cannot back my home,

have to stay until class start.

This is freaking long, man.

Only Jusco can go.

Jusco again? Uhhh...























My friend bought Lady GaGa's album.

He was so excited...

keep showing this...





















Padini ! Bought after trying !

Ehh? Both brothers?

Looks like, if didn't mention that face.

:D





















Disgusting man.. Wakaka...

That's William's leg, with JooMina's shoe in Vincci...






















This 3 person, include me,

was so excited, keep shouting..

" Ahhh !! WL !! SEE THERE ! BE CAREFUL ! "

That zombie really scary ._.

















回眸一笑

Haha. That's my stupid idea.

Nice one lar actually =P


Today totally sit on top of lecturer's head,

we totally have fun with lecturer.

She enjoyed too ! XP

WAKE UP !